30 hours on a bus with no air conditioning later I am in Cairns. I spent the first day looking around the town. I went in to an aboriginal art shop and knocked down a display of hand carved and painted boomerangs, purchased two things out of guilt, signed up for a dive course that cost me 700 dollars, purchased goggles, a snorkel, and a head strap thing for another 150, spent two days in a pool, smell like chlorine, met Bob, am sitting at the McDonalds on the internet...with a stranger, and am going on a boat tomorrow to complete 9 dives in 3 days at depths of 18 meters and one time to 30 meters.(this is 90 feet for us)

I can now, theoretically, SCUBA dive. I also know that I could theoretically lose my air at a depth of about 60 feet and can do nothing but dump my extra weight and breathe out on my way to the surface. This will assuredly result in the Bends where Nitrogen bubbles will come out of my blood and collect in joints thus causing me to scrunch up in pain...horrible pain. If I don't breath out then the gas in my lungs will expand and escape my lungs possibly getting lodged in my brain and killing me. I could also, theoretically, not have anything bad happen to me and spend 3 wonderful days seeing one of the 7 wonders of the world. Let's go with the second option.

Bob is a man I met tonight at dinner who is here in Australia for the third time...bird watching. We discussed the coldest weather we've ever been in and seen, where we are going, where we've been, and what we are doing here. Bob is from New Mexico and won't go back to South Africa because "three big Zulus stepped out from behind a car, sandwiched him, and pointed an automatic gun in his face and told him to leave as quickly as possible."(that last little bit was paraphrased)

I've eaten more peanut butter and honey in the last week than I did in 4th grade...and that was a lot. I'm staying at JJ's Backpackers which costs me 24 dollars a night for room and free breakfast and dinner. Dinner is provided by a place called the Woolshed which gives us free food, expecting us to drink in excess...I do not participate in the optional alcohol purchase. I think the Woolshed used to actually be a woolshed...kinda cool. Last night I witnessed the international goldfish racing championships. This is conducted by placing two goldfish in parallel troughs and then letting their "jockeys," who purchased the chance to be a jockey through an auction and are really just people with straws, blow bubbles behind the fish to convince the fish to go in a given direction. Ireland destroyed the competition and the USA lost to Canada in a stirring performance after annihilating an earlier opponent. The winning "jockey" won a free bungy jump...cheers to Ireland.

The mullet is popular in Cairns. I guess it makes sense...business up front...party in the back. I am personally disturbed.

I am playing a game where I stare people down who are walking by and I see who has more guts based on who makes eye contact longer. I win most of the time because I actually am aware of the game. Plus, they are moving so sometimes I get the added benefit of seeing them stumble after foolishly trying to challenge me. They are then forced to break contact and I win. I did lose once...he was a worthy opponent.

The beaches would be nice here...but there are salt water crocodiles...who will kill you...and stinger jellyfish...who will kill you. This results in ironic "lagoons," we call them pools, in the middle of town, in paradise.

Australians like to do things differently than normal people. They drive on the 'wrong' side of the road. Bed linen is called Manchester. Everyone is a mate and college is high school with upper education being university. (I like the mate thing and now movies look strange because they are driving on the 'wrong' side of the road. Life is relative.)

I am slowly learning to do live translations and speak the language...you know, English...it's a work in progress.

Thank you for the words of encouragement, jokes, and just words in general. It's nice to know that people read this thing. :)